Emotional Intelligence Season 3 - Ep. 1

What is EQ and why is it so important?

When we think about what it means to be smart, we may think of people who do well in school, get high academic grades or have genius IQ. More and more, though, successful leaders are recognised for something arguably more important than a high intelligence quota. They also have the ability to identify, interpret and manage emotions in themselves and in other people. We call this emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence can help you both at work and in your everyday life. Studies have shown that people with a high emotional intelligence quota (EQ) are more likely to kick professional goals in the workplace*. They also feel generally happier and healthier, with better personal and professional relationships.

The impact EQ has on your professional success is often not taken into account. It supports us with:
1. Self-Awareness - Have a think about what sort of person you are, how you react to different scenarios and how others might describe you. Accepting your strengths and weaknesses is the first step to increasing our own self awareness (which plays a pivotal role in EQ)

2. Self Leadership / Management - Emotional intelligence involves the ability to understand and manage our own emotions, which is linked to how likely we will succeed in life. Leadership and Management start with self, and then …

3. Leadership of others - By understanding ourselves intimately, we’re able to hold space for others, without trying to fix them or change them. We lead by example because we’re insanely curious about our own development, which makes us equally curious about the other too.

"By teaching people to tune in to their emotions with intelligence and to expand their circles of caring, we can transform organisations from the inside out and make a positive difference in our world"

- Daniel Goleman

2. What are the five core emotions?

If we summarised all the research done toward labelling the basic human emotions we would generally conclude there are 5 basic emotions: joy, fear, sadness, disgust and anger.  Understanding our emotions is an important part of good mental health.    Below is a diagrammatic representation of the five basic emotions, which contains different words to describe the varying intensity of feelings in these five domains.  All emotions vary in intensity, and we use language to help describe and construct our inner experiences of emotions.  The diagram below can be useful in helping people to describe their feelings.

Emotions also have a physiological component, each emotion is experienced differently within the body.

Being able to name and describe emotions provides us with the capacity to begin to understand ourselves and our reactions.  It is an important part of the capacity to reflect.  Understanding our own emotions also enables us to begin to understand the emotional experience of others, which is crucial to the ability to empathise which is an essential part of healthy relationships.

Emotions have important functions or meanings.  Anger can be an indication that something is wrong, something has been lost and so on.  However, they can also be misleading at times, and the work of  therapy can sometimes be making more balanced interpretations of our emotions.

Regardless of how you might name emotions, it can be useful to understand that they are on a continuum and have a physiological component.

3. What are triggers & Emotional Hijackings ?

Moments when your emotions control your behaviour & you react without thinking. Consequentially you’re paralysed by fear (freeze), flight, fright. The fight, flight, or freeze response is how the body responds to perceived threats. It is involuntary and involves a number of physiological changes that help someone prepare to:

• fight, or take action to eliminate the danger

• flee, which involves escaping the danger

• freeze, which involves becoming immobile

How to Combat 'Flight, Fight, and Freeze'

• Use your breath.

• Practice when you're not upset.

  First reaction will always be emotional, it’s what you do after this that matters 

  When something generates a prolonged reaction - this is what we call a trigger event.

  Reactions are shaped by your personal history